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Forward Not Backward

Yesterday was an amazing day, but I almost let it be taken away from me more times than I can count. My parents, especially my dad, have been........ Well, my dad has just been making me want to walk out of the ho…
This Is Even Harder Than I Thought It Would Be

As far as setting food goals....... Oh my gosh. I. F.A.I.L. I seriously just stood in my kitchen for a half hour or longer. Yesterday, well, I did the complete opposite that I was supposed to. I didn't eat at all. I…
I Am Kind Of Blank......

But....at this very second I am having a moment of slight sanity. And for the first time in almost a year, I know God hasn't left me. I thought He did. He hasn't. I don't completely understand everything, or why so m…
Time Is Passing At A Really Weird Rate.....

I slept for around three or four hours last night. I woke up out of a dead sleep and felt strongly that I shouldn't go back to sleep. Like the title of this post says, time is passing at a really weird rate. I'm not s…
My Mind Is Slightly Lost And Confused

There are so many things going on in my mind right now. Too much. It's been a REALLY long day. First of all, I have something slightly stressing me out. My older sister's boyfriend left her and my nephew for lik…
More Memories...

I've been remembering even more random things lately. Some of it is soooo completely random that I don't understand why I'm even remembering them, but others are really helping me understand some things. There was…
I've Been Thinking.....

Recovery......Do I really want it? Yes. I mean, I don't want this. But I've come to the conclusion that I am telling people one thing and doing another. When I tell people I'm trying to recover why am I doing the opp…
Please.Call.Please.Call.Pleaseeee.Call.Pleaseeee.Calllllll.

I've never felt this desperate to get out of here in my life. I've thought I was at my worst in the past, but this is by far the worst at the moment. I am fighting off doing so many things currently. It's so overwhelm…
So Strange.

There may be pain in the night, but joy comes in the morning.That phrase has been stuck in my mind for the last few hours. Like a broken record, my mind keeps replaying it over and over again. Today was weird. I thoug…
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

It took me forever to fall asleep last night. All night. My mom just woke me up. :) It was the phone. Oh joy! I still don't see why she would even knock on my door at that time. I never wake up that early. Especi…